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This month, Cora shares her 'whirled' views on houseguests' gifts, bizarre beaches and public toilets across Australia.
Dear Cora
We recently had some friends stay with us from overseas. Over the two weeks, we fed them, did their washing, drove them around, paid for most of their meals in restaurants, let them use our phone to make overseas calls, etc. When they left, we simply got a thank you hug and a smile. No card, no bottle of wine or flowers or anything. Not that we were expecting a big present, but a gesture of appreciation would be nice, no? So what is the proper etiquette for a "Thank You Gift" when staying at a friend's house?
Sharon, ACT
Dear Sharon
Ok, first of all, I find your story utterly unbelievable – nobody 'visits' the ACT on purpose (motto: "Canberra: Why Bother?"), let alone for two weeks. If indeed your story is true, then I can empathise with your guests: after being imprisoned in Canberra for that long (undoubtedly brought there under false pretenses), they were probably in such a hurry to escape that they simply dropped everything and ran. (ed: Cora's just kidding, of course ... there's plenty to do in Canberra, just see page 10).
Let's look at it from their side: etiquette for giving a Thank You Gift, or TYG, is a tricky situation, requiring a complex mathematical formula: [$VALUE]TYG = a * (b * c) +/- 3 sin d / e, where a = The nature of the friendship, b = The length of stay, c = How many of the host's things/dishes/pets the guest accidentally broke during the visit, d = The probability/desire of being invited back (relative to being caught snooping through the host's medicine cabinet, underwear drawers or personal files), and e = The number of holiday slideshows or wedding photo albums endured throughout the stay. Guests must also consider the quality of care that the hosts provided: i.e. did the host relinquish the master bedroom ... or just the backyard shed; were the home-cooked meals the standard "Meat & 3 veg" ... or just toast & 1 veg (Vegemite, that is); were the 'meals out' at a restaurant ... or dumpster-diving behind the local chip shop? So you can see, there's a lot to consider. But to make this simple: just go visit them (best to turn up unannounced), trash their house, eat their food and, to make them really miserable, take them BACK to Canberra.
Whirled News
This should get the Greens turning Red
Here's the latest jaw-dropper from the "spend gobs of money because we can" region known as Dubai: according to The Australian a luxury hotel in Dubai is going to create the world's first refrigerated beach. The Palazzo Versace fashion house will reportedly have a series of coolant-filled pipes underneath the sand, effectively absorbing the heat from the sand so that guests' feet don't get too hot. There will also be a refrigerated swimming pool, and potentially a series of giant blower fans to send a cool breeze across the beach. The entire system will be connected to a series of thermostats, run by computers, and is aimed to provide the ultimate in luxury beach-going fun.
So let's get this straight: a "luxury" beach with cold sand, cold water and cool breezes? Couldn't they just send guests to any beach in Melbourne?
Pirates??? Arrrrrrrrre You Kidding?
Oceania Cruises announced recently that pirates had attempted to approach its Nautica passenger ship as it cruised through the Gulf of Aden (Near Somalia and Yemen). After re-checking the calendar to see if "April Fools Day" had arrived 6 months early, I was dumbfounded to learn that, yes, pirates do still exist in this day and age. In fact, the number of pirate attacks on cargo vessels and oil tankers is on the rise. So it seems it's only a matter of time before they start targeting cruise ships in the area. One recently-hijacked captain was quoted in the Times of India as saying: "They took everything — watches, clothes, even underwear. The pirates, who were mostly local fishermen, munched on a kind of Kenyan grass with spinach-like leaves that they sometimes boiled in water. It gave them a high — made their eyes unnaturally bright".
All I can say to this is: I wonder if the 'pirates' were Sharon's ACT visitors? It seems remarkably similar to ACT 'exposure' symptoms.
Cora's Website of the Month:
For when you REALLY gotta go!
Don't get me wrong, I love travel sites like Expedia, Wotif, cancellations.com.au, etc. But when it comes to a website that offers REAL value, you can't go past the National Public Toilet Map, which shows the location of more than 14,000 public and private public toilet facilities across Australia. Useful information is provided about each toilet, such as location, opening hours, availability of baby change rooms, accessibility for people with disabilities and the details of other nearby toilets. The site lets you search for toilets by postcode, town or suburb, then plan a trip with a turn-by-turn description for the quickest route and the toilets along the way. You can print the map, save it to your GPS, or access it by mobile phone!
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